I would like to draw everyone’s attention to Budget McDreamy, who momentarily wears a flat hat before I even get to the episode.
Now that you have that photo in your head, I’m going to proceed with a rundown of the insane activities this evening, dwelling on Tane making a lot of grunting noises.
Things start with Angelo, who today is particularly arrogant because he feels he’s on the precipice of nailing Colby for Ross Nixon’s murder now that he’s listening to his wife’s coded conversations.
Colby is called into the station by Angelo to rile him up.
On the way, Colby runs into Taylor and it moves quickly to a shot of Angelo who reaches into a locked drawer and pulls out a snapshot of his wife hooking up with Colby while listening in their not so secret spot, in case we were still to know the powers of the necklace of Taylor.
“There was a development in the case of your stepfather,” Angelo told Colby at the police station.
Angelo claims that there is a fresh witness, just as Taylor said sometime last week, and that he’s “keen” to hear what the witness has to say.
The ruse is, though, wasted on Colby, who reveals his dominance by being cranky.
At Salt, Colby, and Taylor team-up.
Taylor tells Colby, “You think it’s a smart thing for us to be seen in public.”
Colby was plying her with very full glasses of Chardy just a few weeks ago, but surely this particular meeting-up is more suspicious than that.
Once again, they speak in their sultry voices and it turns easily to talk about spending the night together.
Actually, in front of the beach, they flee to a non-private place as Angelo listens and googles motels in the city and inquires about recent bookings.
Next up is Mac, who needs to get Ari’s mind off Tane, who is doing something dodgy with some dodgy guys about a dodgy stolen van, unbeknownst to them.
And then Tane breaks through the doors of a house in the middle of the night, clutching his stomach and falling on the pavement.
A few weeks ago, he was glassed in a bar and was not even phased, so I can only conclude that he was fired enough times close-up to justify this kind of response.
Anyway, it goes to an ad and for quite a while we’re left in the lurch before Mac finds him grunting on the cement.
He was rushed to the hospital, and nurse Jas was reading out his vitals. No evidence of bullet wounds remains, but nobody has tried to ask him what happened.
Tane proceeds to grunt loudly but manages to get out the terms “van” and “Ziggy” that presumably go unheard because Tori is so busy dreaming about Budget McDreamy’s hot appointment sex.
In the elevator where it all started, Tori and Budget McDreamy find themselves, and the friction between them is tangible, but I don’t sense it.
But Tane’s grunting stops them, at which point Tori recalls that she’s a doctor and advises him to hold in and pop his oxygen mask back at him.
Tane makes a joke that the woman’s husband found him in the act, and again no one discusses how he got his injury.
Did Ziggy use the van to knock him over? Did the people in the dodgy van bash him in the city? Who knows, and the scriptwriters are not at all troubled.
From his exams, the results come back. He’s got a rip in his liver, and Dr. Tori says he has to heal, and then he’ll be able to heal himself.
So, of course, Tane unhooks himself from all the cables, gets out of bed, and buckles under his weight instantly.
He’s done a lot of harm, and Tori is calling for him to run to surgery.
Justin, meanwhile, really talks like it’s the end.
But Leah puts on a confident face and reassures her partner who she calls her grump and insists he’s made the right radiation decision and it’s going to give him the best chance you’d have if the curse had killed more than one of your husbands.